The Love Gift series: What makes the world go round

My Dad once asked me what I thought made the world go around.

“Love,” I exclaimed.

“Wrong,” he said, “money.”

Though deflated by that answer, I ignored my gut instinct and bought into the idea for a while. Honestly, who can deny the importance of money? We need it to satisfy some of our most basic human needs such as keeping a roof over our head and food in our belly.  But could it be the thing that makes the world go around? Could it be the thing that motivates us to get up out of bed in the morning, greet the day and share what’s inside our very soul?

If money was to be my driving force, my reason for enjoying life, then why was it the jobs I held left me feeling empty and cold like I was little more than a cog on a big, steel machine? Everything in me seemed to be screaming, “Live YOUR truth.” But what did that mean?

In my early twenties, I moved to Washington, D.C. One afternoon in the middle of my job search, I penned a poem and then illustrated it. I felt more alive than I had in years. I realized that I had been doing this – writing and creating “on the side” throughout my entire life. I’d excelled at writing in school but despite winning some awards, I always felt as though I was writing for the grade. When it came to art I was more than happy to cut classes in high school to hide out in the art room and create but I could never see myself as “an artist.”  As I realized the lifelong joy I’d experienced in joining these two worlds and “playing”, I came to see that I’d been sacrificing a very important part of my soul. Writing and art made my life go around but could I join these worlds with the world of money?

The first time I followed my heart and created a piece of writing and artwork that sold, I felt as though I’d eaten the most satisfying meal of my life. It was not the sale that filled me but instead losing myself in the process of creation that set me ablaze.  It would be awhile before I fully embraced that lesson because something was nagging at me. A little voice within was asking  - what’s the point? Is it to make what others want? I was unsettled.

Then in August 2010, three weeks after the birth of my second child things went horribly wrong. Due to circumstances far beyond my control and facing conditions that endangered my children, my little family left our home. It was absolutely devastating at first. It did not matter that the building had taken responsibility for all that happened, we had no home and I felt like everything in my life was crumbling.

The love of family and friends who stepped in to help us overwhelmed me. Despite the dark cloud I lived under daily, I felt incredibly blessed. During this time, an artist and friend I simply adored would change my life dramatically; her name is Connie Hozvicka. Inspired by her friendship and intrigued by her unique art, I decided to take a painting class – I’d never been drawn to painting. Yet, despite this and the fact that I had no home, I made the decision to take her painting class, BIG. I was going to inconvenience everyone but I knew I had to do it and what I found changed my life.

The act of painting was not about creating for the purpose of selling but about love – love of exploration, self, humanity, life and the Universe. Until now I’d never loved myself – not like this. I created a person that others would love – as I was desperately afraid to lose love - but I had not given myself enough room nor love to let the true me out into the world.

For the first time I was creating art that allowed me to explore the landscape of my soul. It was the first time that I understood my motivation for creation began with a desire to know what lives inside of me – the special, delicious magic that only I possess. Unearthing my truth and seeing that I am filled with a passion and love for life that I cannot contain most of the time was the greatest gift imaginable in one of the darkest hours of my life. That passion and hunger for life and all its creatures is what propelled me to cartwheel, both literally and figuratively. Armed with the knowledge that at my core, at my very foundation the basis is love I was free to create for me – not for the grade, acceptance or a dollar amount – and my art became a reflection of my genuine authenticity.

Painting unleashed words I’d hidden mistakenly thinking they weren’t literary enough and colors I worried were too bold. Opening the door to this world of honest art making built the fires of an unforgettable love affair. It started the way most good love affairs do with that inability to sleep because dreams cannot compare to the beauty of life and living it with the one you love – in this case, me and my artistic dreams. Slowly, it grew into that hot, roaring fiery love - the kind that makes you feel as though no matter how much time you spend together you still simply can’t get enough. Then it simmered to a playful dancing love – the kind that can weather any storm. Today it is somehow ingrained in stone; it feels as though it has always been there, it was just waiting for me to find it again.

I am still a wild child, a miniature artist wearing my creative heart on my sleeve; we all are but we forget that when we complicate our lives with money and sex. In rediscovering this through the kindness of others and art, I have found that love allows me to be exceptionally vulnerable when I create. It opens my soul so that I may learn, dig deeper and ask questions of the Universe. Love opens the window of opportunity when I make mistakes. It is my best friend and most trusted guide.

One afternoon, my Dad and my daughter sat down to paint and I watched them. At first they were painting side by side quietly but after a brief period of time, they began to talk about life in a way that I had never seen. Love led the way.

“Here grandpa, let me show you how to create a splatter painting,” my daughter said, taking the brush and teaching him how to hold it so that he could properly experiment.

“You can do it,” she said, as he followed her direction, “See? That’s great, just great,” she clapped while watching him, “I’m so proud of you.”

Love motivated them to move forward as two planets circling one another while engaged in the act of creation.

What makes the world go round, Dad? It’s love. What gets me out of bed brings me to the blank page and invites me to connect with people, nature, the Universe and life - love. It is what allows me to say that it is December 2011 and I still do not have a home of own though it is now by choice. It was love that made me decide midway through that horrendous housing ordeal that I would sacrifice and stay with family so as to continue to save to buy a home of our own, a place to fill with love for my children, a dream I am achingly close to fulfilling.

Love is the foundation of my artistic practice and my life. It is love that motivates beautiful souls like you, Margot, to create Poppy Painting workshops that light up every soul I see and love that brings together tribes of exceptional painters, women I call “friends” that I simply adore. When we create from love and build off of that timeless, transformative, Universal feeling that flows through everything like a river, we motivate each other to acts of creation, kindness, and acts that allow people to be fearless enough to devour life while sharing the unique beauty of their heart. Yes, we need money to live and we might even make some from our artwork but we’ll always live to love. That’s what makes our world go around, I’m sure of it now and I’ll never forget.

Natasha "Nacho" Reilly is a writer, artist, professional cartwheeler, and pistachio among peanuts, working both privately and in classes with people to transform their lives with creativity. Want to come play?

www.creativenachos.com

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